Bad influence

Let me start off by saying we were a bit slap happy...


Not enough caffeine? Too much caffeine?

It was sort of my fault. I simply rested my head on my desk for a second. Then I realized you could hear stuff on my desk! Weird.

So then the girls had to try. Of course.












It wasn't a very productive day.

Cut to the point

Today Mrs. C's kindergarten had a sub. She had one arm.

And while that is not funny, it did make for an interesting day in room 36.

Other than the fact that some of those kids are going to need therapy, I really don't have much else to say... so we'll just leave it at that.

Working hard....

Or is that hardly working?

My day went something like this:

I had three classes in the library today, one 1st grade class, one Kindergarten class, and the Special Day Class.

I had quite a lengthy deep philosophical discussion with a 1st grade boy about the existence of leprechauns, and assuming there truly were leprechauns, whether or not the tiny door that suddenly appeared in the 'tree' behind my chair belonged to the same leprechaun, or elf, or sprite, or gnome that showed up unexpectedly (and similarly disappeared) last year, and whether or not we felt knocking would be appropriate (after all, the light did appear to be on suggesting he was home).

I read the delightful story, Leprechauns Never Lie, using my very best Irish brogue, which Tim says is embarrassing, but I think I've got a gift and he's full of blarney. Besides. The kids don't know the difference.

I had another discussion with my Kindergarten friend, Aiden, who is very excited because next year he gets to make a leprechaun trap in 1st grade, and don't I think it'll be a good idea if he brings it in the library so we can catch one?



After work I headed over to Sam's Club, where my Visiting Teacher discovered me in the pet food aisle, and "killed two birds with one stone." . . _ . . . . . . _ . _ . _ . . _ _ _ . . . . . . _ . _ _ . . _ . . . . _ _ . . _ _ . . _ . . _ _ _ . . _ . . . _ .

(My sister will be proud. I didn't say anything derogatory about Visiting Teaching. However, that is Morse code for "Help. I think I'm being ripped off.")


After that, I headed home to my desk to work for my other boss, whereupon I was distracted by just about everything.

I considered starting my treadmill routine and wondered where my walking shoes were. Alarmed at the prospect, I followed some sage advice and quickly lay down until the urge to exercise passed.

My bedroom boasts a wondrous new addition, and from my bed I have a perfect 42" LCD view of Emma, which I watched until the natives became restless, at which time I provided my family with a delicious and healthy home cooked meal sustenance.

The rest of my night will most likely find me happily engrossed in this, or this, and ending with this.

Which brings me back to "working hard?" I'd say it's nice work if you can get it!

Just because it makes me happy...

Hush

Little Daylan checked out a book yesterday… all about sea turtles. “Mrs. Lundberg? Wanna know why I’m checking out another book about the sea?”

“Why’s that, Daylan?”

“Cause I’m gonna read it to Hush.”

“Hush?”

“Yeah. He’s my goldfish.”

“And you’re going to read him a story?”

“Yeah. I figure since he’s from the ocean, he’d like that.”

“Hush is a lucky fish.”

“Yeah.”

I just can’t seem to resist the urge to write a children’s book about Daylan and Hush. I already know the last word.

Flush.

Cool Summer Reads…

For Kids!

We’ve got a summery theme going on at the library (Book Beach) right now… “Catch the Reading Wave!” and “Dive Into Reading!”

I spend my days under a giant multicolored beach umbrella, watching kids ‘laying out’ on beach towels amid beach balls and sand pails…. reading.

I could create a long list of great books for each grade level, but these are my current picks:

Kindergarten
The Rainbow Fish

Shining from Rainbow Fish's multicolored body are several shimmering silver scales. All the other fish in the ocean admire him and want to play, but Rainbow Fish is too proud to play with them; nor will he share his sparkling scales. Alone and friendless, Rainbow Fish soon learns that generosity is far more rewarding than vanity.

1st and 2nd grades
Magic Tree House

These fantastic books revolve around eight-year-old Jack and his sister Annie, who stumble upon a magic tree house filled with books that transports them back in time to the places described in the books. First graders love listening and following along to these stories, and they’re perfect for independent second grade readers.


3rd grade
Weslandia

School is over and Wesley needs a summer project. Having learned that every civilization has a staple food crop, he decides to plant a garden and start his own—civilization, that is. He turns over a plot of earth in his yard, and plants begin to grow. Soon they tower above him and bear a curious-looking fruit. As Wesley experiments, he discovers that the plant will provide food, clothing, shelter, and even recreation. It isn't long before neighbors and classmates have developed more than an idle curiosity about Wesley and exactly how he is spending his summer vacation.

4th grade
Skinnybones

For the smallest kid on the baseball team, Alex “Skinnybones” Frankovitch has a major-league big mouth! But when he brags his way into a pitching contest, this might be one mess that not even Alex can talk his way out of. I read this aloud to a fourth grade class, and they loved it. It’s hysterical!


5th and 6th grades
Swindle

After a mean collector named Swindle cons him out of his most valuable baseball card, Griffin Bing must put together a band of misfits to break into Swindle's compound and recapture the card. There are many things standing in their way -- a menacing guard dog, a high-tech security system, a very secret hiding place, and their inability to drive -- but Griffin and his team are going to get back what's rightfully his . . . even if hijinks ensue. I can’t keep this on the library shelves. It’s a favorite of both boys and girls.

Because today was the first day of school...

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?

CLASS: Maria.

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me!

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '

MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'

MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand....

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher

5th time's the charm?

My boy was nominated. Again. I'm keeping my fingers, toes, and eyes crossed. Especially my eyes.

Category 14
Best Traditional Pop Vocal Album

(For albums containing 51% or more playing time of VOCAL tracks.)

Still Unforgettable Natalie Cole [DMI Records]
The Sinatra Project Michael Feinstein [Concord Music Group]

Noël Josh Groban [143/Reprise]

In The Swing Of Christmas Barry Manilow [Hallmark/Arista]

Rufus Does Judy At Carnegie Hall Rufus Wainwright [Geffen]

Shakin' and Quakin'

Today our school had an earthquake drill.
We were having a "7.8".
I did not duck and cover.
Besides, there was no one in the library.
(I made sure of that).
Kari, the speech teacher, sat with me while we waited.
And filed her nails.
The principal started walking from the office at 9:40.
She made it to the blacktop at 10:05.
(She has a bad back).
The quake 'hit.'
The secretary in the office had a hard time reading her card over the loud speaker.
She couldn't pronounce "personnel."
Kari and I took our red backpacks so we’d be EC (earthquake correct).
We noticed Mrs. Purcar, had Maxi Pads in her red backpack.
For 10 minutes, we discussed the possible reasons why.
Mrs. B had to go to the bathroom.
I suggested she talk to Mrs. Purcar.
Mrs. Sars’ kids told Ms. Kinney, “Our teacher is missing!”
To which she replied, “Okay. Come with me.”
She never looked for Mrs Sars.
Ms. Kinney is just “like that” sometimes.
I told Mrs. Sars to buck up.
After all, she got to ride on a stretcher.
Kari and I took folding chairs to the field.
We weren't standing for an hour.
We also took magazines.
The time simply flew.

Shredded pillows

Munched headboards.

Not a problem.

Concerned over having Breaking Dawn in my library, I was amused to overhear a couple of giggling 6th grade girls who apparently obtained their own copy....

Girl #1: "Wasn't that part where Edward chewed the pillow and bit the headboard funny?"
(giggling)
Girl #2: "I know! I don't know how Bella could have slept through that!"

School Daze

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'

Why me?

How does this keep on happening to me? Every 6 months! I just served in February! How is that even fair? Can they do that? Apparently they can! It's state then federal then state again. And neither cares nor excuses due to being called for the other.

Knaves.

Learning the drill

Remember the Duck and Cover drills (for both air raids and earthquakes), and fire drills where we had to practice "Stop! Drop! and Roll!" from elementary school days?

Today in elementary school we still have drills. Lotsa drills. Fire drills are especially fun. There are actually 3 different bell alarms that go off (they use a different one each time)... there's a European ambulance one, a longer ehhhhhhh, ehhhhhh, ehhhhhh, ehhhhhh one, and some other one I don't remember.

We no longer have to Stop, Drop, and Roll, but we're supposed to close the doors, turn out the lights, grab our red emergency backpacks, slap either a red or green sign on the door indicating whether or not there are injuries, (and I have two of those doors in the library that need signs), make sure the kids don't make a peep, and march in perfect order to the blacktop (through the supposedly burning hallways?), where we stand in perfect silent lines until the "all clear" is sounded. Did I mention that the principal is standing there with a stopwatch? Well, she is. We're timed. Oh we're very good at fire drills. We've got them nailed. We've got 1,000 kids, and we're slick and fast.

My next favorite are the new "lock down" drills. My chest gets tight even just writing about this one. In a lock down drill as soon as you hear the alarm you've got 10 seconds. TEN! If a little crying Kindergarten kid comes begging to be let in and you've got your doors locked and it's after your 10 second mark, you can't let the kid in! (Apparently they might be a pawn).

All doors must be locked (I have two on opposite sides of the library). All window blinds must be closed. All lights must be out. Including any/all computer monitors. And every single person must be completely out of sight. I'm getting pretty good at this one. I'm also pretty motivated. Why? WHY? Uh, hellooooo.... they always go for the librarian first! Anyway... I start on the left side and lock! Run to the story room and whip those mini blinds shut! Slam off those lights! Run to the other door (praying for all I'm worth that the shooter didn't get there first) and lock! Run to the waaaaay back of the library and jump to reach the mini blinds all (and I mean all) across the back and whip! Whip! Whip! those mini blinds closed.

All the while hoping the teacher has 35 kids crammed in between two bookcases in the middle, making sure that they're 2 feet in from the ends so they're not seen from either door (since there are no blinds on the doors!). This all has to be silent. Silent. Then wait as the principal and visiting district people and police representative come by and rattle the doors and try to peer in through the blinds in the back. Even though you know it's a drill, the adrenalin is soaring and you almost think you're a gonner! Then, inevitably, there's always this.... "Shhhh! We're hiding, Billy. Hold still. No, no, don't cry Emily, this is just pretend!"

A month or so ago I was alone in the library with a visiting board of educ. member (who was apparently, unbeknownst to me, there for a surprise earthquake drill), when the alarm went off. "This is a lock down! This is a lock down!" I start my running and locking and whisking and I said to her, "You might want to leave while you have a chance because I'm not opening that door after 10 seconds." I wasn't laughing. And she left. Hate those drills.

Then there are the earthquake drills. Now these really are fun! Really! These drills are so detailed and planned out. All doors must remain open. Never touch the light switch (on or off). Duck and cover under the table (you try getting 34 kids under 2 tables) or next to the lower bookcases. Wait for the bell. Grab your red emergency pack. Slap your green or red signs on your doors, and proceed silently and orderly through the hallways (don't get me started) to the blacktop in perfect lines.

Now this isn't all. Oh no. We have predetermined 'injuries' such as severed or broken limbs, head injuries, wheelchair and gurney victims. We even have dead students and faculty. We have teams that are 'sweepers' (who get to wear hard hats!!) to comb through every building and locate and account for any injured or trapped. We have runners who carry back and forth the emergency sheets to be filled out by each teacher regarding the location and condition of their students. We have a triage set up with portable bathrooms and medical supplies and even a tent/morgue for the dead people. Each class has earthquake kits that keep students busy while they await their parents eventual arrival. We even have crazy parents! This is the best! They run in screaming and semi violent trying to grab their kids and the neighbor kids! There is real time communication between our school and the district personnel via radio and whatever else they use.

And we're fast. Ohhhh, we're fast. And quiet!! And so efficient. We can evacuate to the field and rescue our wounded in record time. We can even subdue the crazy parent. (Even the one who threatened to pull my hair out last year if I didn't let her take the neighbor kid. She sorta scared me). We're actually... one of the best in the district.

But yesterday happened. Yesterday. We're only 14 miles from the epicenter, so it was a bit strong. Books fell off my shelves... and then the children started screaming. The 1st and 2nd graders were eating lunch on the tables. (Have you ever heard 120 1st graders screaming at once?) And thus began the semi organized bedlam. There were only two of us in the library, me and the ELL teacher. And when it hit, she just stood up and I sort of walked over to the door, grabbing my cell phone and the red emergency pack, and thought for a moment, "Now is it fire open and earthquake closed? Or is it earthquake open and fire closed?" I gave up and just walked out the door over to the screaming menagerie at the lunch tables.

The noon aids were just standing there on their cell phones. There was a bell of some sort that rang and one of the secretaries trying to say "Duck and Cover!" over the loud speaker (For all the good it did). We're supposed to wait for an all clear bell but classes were already on their way outside. Some of the noon aids woke up and tried to get the little ones under the lunch tables -- which they did... taking their lunch trays with them. It was chicken nugget day after all. Why on earth they didn't get them onto the grass in the quad (yes, it was clear of wires and danger of falling stuff) which was literally 2 feet behind the tables, is beyond me. Just stay there under that massive metal overhang kids!

Only a handful of teachers had their backpack. No one thought to hang their red or green signs. I'm not even sure all ducked, let alone covered. No one swept their assigned building or ran information back and forth. No one got to wear a hard hat. I don't think we even know where they really are. No one saw a wheelchair or stretcher and no dead people tent was set up. There was no radio. We had real life crazy parents (like 30 of them) running onto campus and several fathers hopping fences. We had teachers from out of state who had never experienced an earthquake before. The attendance clerk finally made an appearance with her Rolodex and walked up and down asking teachers if all were accounted for. There were about 20 crying 4th graders, about 140 crying kinders, and a principal who couldn't stop laughing.

Absolute chaos. It was the first time there was actually a quake during school and we bombed spectacularly. Maybe it's a good thing. Sure there was no need (this time) for all hardhats and stretchers. We were lucky. But you can bet they'll be a committee to figure it all out. We'll have more drills and we'll get even better and slicker and quieter and faster. We'll discuss new ways and places of ducking and covering and evacuating. (Maybe we'll even get flame-proof hoods, when we evacuate like they have in Japan!) We'll review and go over the fact that we should have carried on with all the details (like hard hats) even if they weren't needed. What better time for a drill? But it really won't matter. Every situation and every occurrence is different when it comes right down to it. It's real life. You just kind of have to roll with it.

Ding-a-ling!

The Golden Bell Awards program, now in its 28th year, promotes excellence in education by recognizing outstanding programs in school districts and county offices of education throughout California. Golden Bell Awards reflect the depth and breadth of education programs necessary to address students’ changing needs.

And I got one! For "Outstanding ELR Program" for my Library!

Thankyou.Thankyouverymuch.